Friday, May 17, 2013

It's time for the hop!

Recently I went on a school field trip with my son out of state to Colonial Williamsburg and Jamestown and Yorktown. It was a fast and furious two days but at one stop, as we were walking around, a couple of men passed us holding hands. They were older, in their sixties I would guess, very cute, and I did the same thing I do when I see any couple that still holds hands  and was all awwww. But there were other people, not from our school group, (we were on our own by this point), and there was some snickering and whispering and elbow jabbing that I could have lived without. My son, because he's at that age where everyone is just too tedious for words, announced, "they're married," with enough disgust at the folks being rude to shut them up.

Needless to say, I was very proud and told him so but was then surprised when he questioned me about why I was proud.
"You stuck up for gay marriage and equal rights there," I told him.
"They were married, they had rings on, didn't you see?"
"I did."
"People get married, who cares?"

So I had to explain that millions of Americans do care because it's not a right they simply have. Not everyone who falls in love can get married if they want to. And of course I got the squint because he doesn't get it because he's grown up with me and his father who have always been aboard the marriage equality train.
And it was sad a month ago when I was talking to him about it and its sad now that we are still having the debate about marriage in 2013.
I was trying to figure out what to post for the blog hop honoring the International Day Against Homophobia & Transphobia (IDAHO)this year and I remembered back to last year when I was discussing marriage equality and it's so strange to still be doing it. I had to explain DOMA to my kids today and about how gay and lesbian couples in Canada can get married but here in the US there are only certain states where its legal.
"Are you sure you know what you're talking about?" My son.
"That can't be right." My daughter.
They don't believe me because it's so ridiculous. The good news is I know if (heaven forbid), the laws still haven't changed by the time they are old enough to vote, then they will, indeed, with the help of many other peoples' kids, change them. And that will be another awesome step in the acceptance for all.


Okay so don't forget to click the HAHAT badge there to be redirected back to the home page and visit all the other wonderful people participating. The hop goes on until the 27th of May so you have plenty of time to visit everyone. As part of the hop, I'm giving away the winner's choice of an ebook from my backlist, including Still, to a randomly selected person who comments here. I'll announce the winner in a post on the 28th. Happy hopping everyone!


  1. I love your books.

  2. You're an inspiration and so are your munchkins! I <3 You.

  3. I want to hug your kids. Love how these issues are just plain as day and kids call that out!

    thanks for sharing, Mary!

  4. My children are little 2 and 4. I sincerely hope that by the time it's time for them to choose to marry that it will not matter who they pick

  5. Thank you for taking part in the hop!

    In order to combat hatred, we must spread love. Educate others, bring awareness, because every person who has their mind opened is one person closer to a world where homophobia and transphobia doesn’t exist.

  6. that kids can react so naturally to it gives all of us hope for the future...
    Looking from an outsider´s POV (as in my country marriage has been legal for years) I can´t believe that a country such as US, who is always one step ahead of everyone else, is still so hold up on the issue.
    thank you for the post!

  7. I firmly believe those against marriage equality are those with a "my way or the highway" way of thinking. They are the ones with the loudest voices that spread fear and hate. It is wonderful to see that the majority of people are now raising their voices and drowning out the sounds of the intolerant.

    Your kids sound great and I am also very proud of my kids who don't understand why gay marriage is an even an issue.

  8. thank you Mary and I really hope that one day we won't need the HOP :) It really gives me hope to see children reacting to same genre marriages like its something natural :)

  9. I too am trying to raise my children to see there is no difference. Love is love. When lots of people on facebook changed there picture to the equality sign, I talked to my 14 & 16 year olds about it. My oldest thought gay marriage was already legal everywhere, and when I told him no, he just said "Well that's dumb" and I said "well put young man!" I think the next generation is definitely on the right track. I know I am proud of my boys and their views.

  10. You must be very proud of your kids. Thanks for the posting and being part of the Hop.

    strive4bst(At) yahoo(Dot) com

  11. Cute story about your son and the couple. Kids just accept until or if, they are taught not too. I'm an 'ahh' person too.

    Thanks for the post and for the giveaway opportunity.
    sophiarose1816 at gmail dot com

  12. Lovely post!
    Wouldn't it be nice if we could all remember what the world looked like when we were 5? It is so refreshing to see things through your children's eyes.

  13. Thanks so much for participating!


  14. How can it be legal to be married in one state, and illegal in another? Well, the same way Jim Crow laws existed in some states, but not in others. The Supreme Court found those laws to be unconstitutional. Eventually, making marriage a heterosexual privilege will be illegal, too. YAY! Can't wait.
    brendurbanist at gmail dot com

  15. Love that your son was so accepting :) Hopefully we'll have equality sooner rather than later :)

  16. Thank you for such a good post. We all have to keep raising awareness and working towards change, and it sounds like your family is doing a great job of it! Thanks for participating in the blog hop!
    awindandbooks at gmail dot com

  17. Your post is bringing tears to my eyes. It makes me very hopeful for the future and it's wonderful to hear that your kids stand up for what they think/believe.

    humhumbum AT yahoo DOT com

  18. Love all your books. Please count me in.


  19. Can you imagine our world if more parents taught their children the values you have taught yours - instead of the hatred. Thanks for supporting a fantastic cause

  20. Wonderful post Mary.
    Heh... It's so awesome to see some kids reaction to what the stupid prejudice of others is causing.
    It's refreshing and... really the whole truth right there.
    Marriage is Marriage. And the only thing that requires is for two people to be in love.


  21. I wish all parents were like you. I've been working on my mom for years. When I was in highschool she was horrified to find out I had friends who were gay- afraid that it was catching. Slowly over the years her opinions have changed. No she's kinda "live and let live" which is huge progress. I still wish she and others in my family were more supportive of marriage equality. Its hard to listen to the people you love be so judgmental and prejudiced. But then I look at the progress my sister and I have made with them over the past decade and have hope. You're right- eventually it will happen.

  22. Your kids are great! Hopefully there are more children like yours growing up in open-minded families!

    Thank you for participating and for the giveaway!

    stormymonday AT gmx DOT com

  23. Kids are amazing aren't they!!!!! ;)
    Thanks for being such an awesome author and bring us on wonderful trips with some of the best people I would love to meet.


  24. Gotta love the kids! Thank you for posting!
    wendynjason04 at gmail dot com

  25. Your kids are lucky to have you ^.^

    eripike at gmail dot com

  26. That was a wonderful post. You should be very proud of your kids. Thanks for sharing and participating in the hop.


  27. great kids! I love that your son didn't believe you! LOL.

    enter me in the drawing please!

  28. I always get excited when I find you have a new release at Amazon. I love your writing!


  29. I have so much hope for the world children like yours will live in. I always wondered about the term in the US constitution that states "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal..." Your children show how much self-evident still needs to be the word used and how it still is evolving.

  30. Thank you so much for telling us the story of your awesome kids.

  31. How great that they questioned your veracity! We need more of that in the world, can you all go on tour and do some motivational speaking? I only suggest it because you seem to have done a very good job so far.

  32. It's sad that we have to explain the realities outside our own worldview to the kids, but it is always wonderful to think about them going out into the world as adults ready to tackle the changes that need to be made.

    May we always be like your son and stand up when we see others not being treated right, and may we always be like your daughter questioning how something that's so wrong can be law!

    Thank you for being part of the hop and sharing with us!

    caroaz [at] ymail [dot] com

  33. Isn't it wonderful when our children speak out like that!? good for him and good for you for teaching by example. I'd love to win one of your books.

  34. Wonderful that your son spoke up.

    Thanks for participating in this great hop!


  35. It's never the kids that have a problem is it? Thanks so much for your post in this blog hop! Such an important subject.
    OceanAkers @

  36. Great post! Thank you for taking part in the hop!
    sstrode at scrtc dot com

  37. Thank you for the post.

    peggy1984 at live dot com

  38. You've got some great kids Mary. Also it is true I can't believe that people still can't marry the person they love.

  39. I love what your kids said. I wish that the rest of the world saw it that way, because your kids got it right. Thanks for sharing!